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	<title>CC Gonzalez, Author at Obsidian News | Oregon Youth Voices</title>
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	<title>CC Gonzalez, Author at Obsidian News | Oregon Youth Voices</title>
	<link>https://obsidian.oregonyouthvoices.com</link>
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		<title>The Big Decision—Advice For Future Graduates</title>
		<link>https://obsidian.oregonyouthvoices.com/2023/05/31/the-big-decision-advice-for-future-graduates/</link>
		
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[CC Gonzalez]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 31 May 2023 01:23:12 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Opinion]]></category>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://www.oregonyouthvoices.com/obsidian/?p=1150</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[<p>With graduation coming up quickly, seniors are under pressure to choose what they want to pursue in the fall. Whether that be trade school, community college, university or right into a job, it’s an extensive choice with every option full of pros and cons.&#160; According to Town Charts, in Oregon, only 47.8% of high school graduates attend college right after graduation, while in Deschutes County, 35.4%, Jefferson County with 20.9%, and Crook County, with 38.9% of students seeking higher education. [&#8230;]</p>
<p>The post <a href="https://obsidian.oregonyouthvoices.com/2023/05/31/the-big-decision-advice-for-future-graduates/">The Big Decision—Advice For Future Graduates</a> appeared first on <a href="https://obsidian.oregonyouthvoices.com">Obsidian News | Oregon Youth Voices</a>.</p>
]]></description>
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<p class="wp-block-paragraph">With graduation coming up quickly, seniors are under pressure to choose what they want to pursue in the fall. Whether that be trade school, community college, university or right into a job, it’s an extensive choice with every option full of pros and cons.&nbsp;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">According to <a href="https://www.towncharts.com/Oregon/Education/Deschutes-County-OR-Education-data.html">Town Charts</a>, in Oregon, only 47.8% of high school graduates attend college right after graduation, while in Deschutes County, 35.4%, Jefferson County with 20.9%, and Crook County, with 38.9% of students seeking higher education.</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">While college isn&#8217;t necessary for every field or passion, it can be a step in the right direction when pursuing a degree-based career. According to <a href="https://truthout.org/articles/75-of-new-jobs-require-a-degree-while-only-40-of-potential-applicants-have-one/">Truthout</a>, 75% of jobs require a bachelor&#8217;s degree. The <a href="https://www.bls.gov/careeroutlook/2023/data-on-display/education-pays.htm">U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics</a> also provides data that shows those with degrees make more money compared to those with only a high school diploma.&nbsp;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Many students would agree that choosing a school and a major can be very overwhelming while still trying to complete their last year. Some teens have always known what their path would be after graduation, but that&#8217;s not the case for most.&nbsp;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Gabriela Chicuellar is a senior at Madras High School and has chosen a university to pursue her career after graduation.&nbsp;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">“The hardest part for me [when picking a major] was that I could be choosing something that isn&#8217;t truly meant for me. I worry that once I finish putting all this effort into my education, I won&#8217;t be happy with my choice… it&#8217;s important to remember that even if you end up changing your mind it will be okay and you&#8217;ll find what&#8217;s meant for you.”</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Another senior from Madras High, Isabella Reynoso, has also chosen a school and major.&nbsp;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">“The hardest part for me was figuring out where I wanted to go to school, considering my top school choice was way too expensive even with financial aid. Some advice I would give the next class of students is that just because you&#8217;re not going to the fanciest school doesn&#8217;t mean you&#8217;ll be any less than those who are, if anything you planned better than they did by saving money.”</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Money has been such a definitive factor when choosing a higher institution for this generation of students. People spend thousands of dollars to go to school just to still be in debt later on in life — the price many choose simply for a diploma with higher prestige.&nbsp;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">The idea that you only have one option is old-fashioned. You can do many different things with a college degree. Changing majors, transferring schools or dropping out of college are personal choices, as long as the choice fulfills dreams and is the best option for a specific individual.&nbsp;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">College isn&#8217;t the only option after high school. Trade schools are an alternative some choose if they want a career in welding, mechanics, engineering or plumbing. Trade schools can also be more affordable than traditional universities for many families.&nbsp;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Sam Loza is the Madras High Future Center Coordinator who works with students daily, helping them apply to schools and scholarships. She also works to connect kids to personal mentors for better one-on-one time and attention.&nbsp;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">“College is a big investment in both money and time, so my recommendation is if you know what you want to do requires a college degree, definitely go to college. If you don&#8217;t want to go to college then do not go and do not let people pressure you,” said Loza.</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Every student has a different passion that requires additional steps after graduation. Whether or not you apply to a college or a trade school, a simple choice doesn&#8217;t define how successful a student will be in the future—and comparing choices to peers won&#8217;t help.&nbsp;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Loza explains college is always an option, even later in life—many individuals decide to go back or start college in the future. She also says there&#8217;s a lot of value in other programs like internships, apprenticeships, and career technical education. With these options, students can be saving a lot more money and time in a career that doesn&#8217;t even require a college degree.&nbsp;&nbsp;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Even if someone chooses to not go to any school at all and continue to work, they can still be just as successful and fulfilled as their peers. With this in mind, do not try to base your decision on any influence of your family, peers, teachers or anyone else. A student should make the choice for themselves.</p>
<p>The post <a href="https://obsidian.oregonyouthvoices.com/2023/05/31/the-big-decision-advice-for-future-graduates/">The Big Decision—Advice For Future Graduates</a> appeared first on <a href="https://obsidian.oregonyouthvoices.com">Obsidian News | Oregon Youth Voices</a>.</p>
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		<post-id xmlns="com-wordpress:feed-additions:1">1150</post-id>	</item>
		<item>
		<title>Not all fun…</title>
		<link>https://obsidian.oregonyouthvoices.com/2023/04/28/not-all-fun/</link>
		
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[CC Gonzalez]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Fri, 28 Apr 2023 04:49:12 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Opinion]]></category>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://www.oregonyouthvoices.com/obsidian/?p=1116</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[<p>It could be assumed that some high schoolers smoke or drink on their own time and their administration can’t control what they do outside of school, but it seems to become a growing issue in schools, specifically their students. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention says, in 2022, 85.5% of high school students and 81.5% of middle school students who used e-cigarettes in the past 30 days reported using a flavored e-cigarette during that time. E-Cigarettes, dab pens and [&#8230;]</p>
<p>The post <a href="https://obsidian.oregonyouthvoices.com/2023/04/28/not-all-fun/">Not all fun…</a> appeared first on <a href="https://obsidian.oregonyouthvoices.com">Obsidian News | Oregon Youth Voices</a>.</p>
]]></description>
										<content:encoded><![CDATA[
<p class="wp-block-paragraph">It could be assumed that some high schoolers smoke or drink on their own time and their administration can’t control what they do outside of school, but it seems to become a growing issue in schools, specifically their students. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention says, in 2022, 85.5% of high school students and 81.5% of middle school students who used e-cigarettes in the past 30 days reported using a flavored e-cigarette during that time.</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">E-Cigarettes, dab pens and nicotine sticks have become more and more popular over the years compared to traditional cigarettes. In the same context, the actual marijuana flower, or bud, has been replaced with dab pens similar to vape pens. These versions are still used but not as much compared to the new electric substances. While the sure reason is unknown, many users have been put under the impression that these electronic versions are less dangerous than a cigarette or a joint, when that is not the case. </p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">This issue has gone as far as being present in school during school hours. Vape detectors are now available in schools due to the rise of this problem. Many TikTok videos also feature jokes and skits in their videos about using substances while they&#8217;re in school. These videos show students meeting in bathrooms for “breaks” to use their devices.&nbsp;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">It has become a recent trend despite the dangers. It could be popularity, feelings or just for fun. The use of substances like these at such a young age can take a toll as users develop. The Addiction Center website explains the dangers of using these devices and substances too young.</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">“Substance abuse affects teen brain development by interfering with neurotransmitters and damaging connections within the brain. Reducing the ability to experience pleasure. Creating problems with memory…”</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">A lot of teens are aware of these risks, but they continue to use their devices excessively. An anonymous student from Madras High speaks on how they know their peers feel about using.&nbsp;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">“I just know they have fun doing it and their biggest excuse is ‘you only live once’. This might not be super smart but I mean we’re young and dumb so who really cares right now”</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Even if they don&#8217;t feel any changes or issues now, that doesn&#8217;t mean they&#8217;re not there or won&#8217;t show up eventually. These damages can be irreversible.&nbsp;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Dr. Shewit Giovanni is from the Division of Pulmonary and Critical Care Medicine at OHSU and specializes in pulmonology, including the effects of e-cigarettes. She was asked about the long and short-term effects of using these substances and devices at a young age.</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">“Data shows there&#8217;s a lot of harm in multiple ways, one of the most serious is long term “e-cigarettes associated lung injury” (EALI) that causes actual damage in the cellular level and presents respiratory failure that can take patients to the ICU, mechanical ventilation and intubation”</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">“When it comes to nicotine, one of the biggest complications other than the development of pulmonary disease, a lot of patients that start in adolescence have a really hard time getting off it and it goes into adulthood. This leads to effects on the pulmonary system, COPD, bronchitis, and increased cardiovascular symptoms including heart disease and atherosclerosis. So every single system is affected by tobacco exposure and can be at increased risk when they start early.”</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Dr. Giovanni goes on to talk about the long-term effects of the use of marijuana on teens in terms of development and behavior.&nbsp;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">“We know that there&#8217;s an increase in psychiatric symptoms especially in patients that have an underlying psychiatric diagnosis. It connects back to academic performance, cognition, sleep driving, all of these things have been shown in multiple studies to date, particularly with cannabis usage in youth.”</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">While we seem to think marijuana is not as dangerous as nicotine, there are still different dangers teens accept into their bodies when they choose to smoke marijuana even if they think it is medicinal or harmless because of what the media shows them.&nbsp;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">The CDC published a fact sheet on their site, “Smoking and Youth”, about the dangers and issues of smoking young including a section about e-cigarettes. People still aren&#8217;t aware of how severe the toxins could be to youth, though they should be. </p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">They say no youth should use e-cigarettes or any other tobacco product because nicotine is known to be addictive, toxic to developing fetuses, and harmful to adolescent brain development.</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">The CDC also has a separate information section about teen use of marijuana.</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Temporary psychosis is more likely to occur among marijuana users&#8230;People who start using marijuana at a younger age and use it more regularly have a stronger link between marijuana usage and schizophrenia. They also mention that using marijuana at a young age can have the potential for addiction.&nbsp;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">The use of e-cigarettes and marijuana has many dangerous side effects that teens are aware of but choose to ignore. There are so many dangers they aren&#8217;t aware of that could make it more convincing for them to quit if they know what they’re getting themselves into and what they’re going to put their bodies through just for some “fun.”</p>
<p>The post <a href="https://obsidian.oregonyouthvoices.com/2023/04/28/not-all-fun/">Not all fun…</a> appeared first on <a href="https://obsidian.oregonyouthvoices.com">Obsidian News | Oregon Youth Voices</a>.</p>
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		<post-id xmlns="com-wordpress:feed-additions:1">1116</post-id>	</item>
		<item>
		<title>Spotlight Fight</title>
		<link>https://obsidian.oregonyouthvoices.com/2023/03/15/spotlight-fight/</link>
		
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[CC Gonzalez]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 15 Mar 2023 22:55:46 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Opinion]]></category>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://www.oregonyouthvoices.com/obsidian/?p=1001</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[<p>In most movies about high school, one of the main characters almost always plays either football or basketball and the side characters are in band or choir.&#160; Some sports might get more attention than others from their schools, but that doesn&#8217;t mean they’re not as important. Other activities like band, choir and theater are just as competitive as sports so they should get the same attention from their schools. Historically, many schools give the most attention to sports like football. [&#8230;]</p>
<p>The post <a href="https://obsidian.oregonyouthvoices.com/2023/03/15/spotlight-fight/">Spotlight Fight</a> appeared first on <a href="https://obsidian.oregonyouthvoices.com">Obsidian News | Oregon Youth Voices</a>.</p>
]]></description>
										<content:encoded><![CDATA[
<p class="wp-block-paragraph">In most movies about high school, one of the main characters almost always plays either football or basketball and the side characters are in band or choir.&nbsp;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Some sports might get more attention than others from their schools, but that doesn&#8217;t mean they’re not as important. Other activities like band, choir and theater are just as competitive as sports so they should get the same attention from their schools.</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Historically, many schools give the most attention to sports like football. This could be because maybe that sport achieves the most or it could be because administrators don’t take the time to recognize other sports and activities like soccer, swimming, track, theater, band or even tennis.</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">On the <a href="https://www.osaa.org/">OSAA</a> website, for every list of sports, football is the first one listed. This doesn’t necessarily mean they want all the focus on football, but if that’s the first thing someone sees every time they open the site, it might be the big focus of someone just browsing the site.&nbsp;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">In the fall, football seems to have all the attention throughout the whole season. For example, Madras High boys soccer achieved league championships but the only talk was upset about having a homecoming soccer game instead of a football game. During winter sports, typically, basketball gets more light shone on it compared to wrestling, unless a wrestler takes a big spot in a tournament. Spring sports hardly ever get attention unless they get far in the competition like in track.</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Vanessa Young is a current senior at Madras High School who participates in choir, band and theater. Young and other performers often achieve many great things with the group that go unnoticed. Young and another student, Olivia Johnson, have recently been in the acting competition International Thespian Regionals and qualified for state in the musical duo category. Young explains their duo scored so high they automatically go to nationals in Indiana. </p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">“I don’t think that the arts at Madras High get nearly as much attention as they should,” Young said. “There have been so many talented students who just don’t get the recognition I believe that they deserve. Lots of students are uneducated about what the music department does so many achievements go unnoticed. The sheer amount of musical talent that comes from the school is astounding considering our small size.”&nbsp;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Young believes that the administrators aren’t completely at fault and they might not know how to recognize the talent, or know how extremely competitive the field is and how much time and work it takes — like any other activity. She is also interested to see if there will be any change.&nbsp;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">It could be true that the administration in school doesn&#8217;t know or understand how the arts “win” like most sports. When a football team plays a game, they play in a giant stadium for an entire town with lights, noise and support in the stands. Students who don’t play attend to watch because that’s all they hear about in school on the day of the game. When surveyed about their knowledge of marching band competitions an overwhelming majority of students agreed that they have no idea how, where or when bands or choir groups compete with other groups. </p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Dan Barendse, the athletic director at Madras High, has worked to make sure athletics and activities are recognized and events run smoothly. He’s working to be better about recognizing everyone at the school.</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Barendse explains that school officials rely on the student body to get out information about sports and activities and he feels it’s the best place for it to come from. He also mentions since his time at Madras High there have been more and more clubs added to their roster. For example, they offer GSA, girls&#8217; horse club, Native American student union, environmental club and more. </p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">“Whatever people can come up with, we add,” Barendse said. He is mostly focused on facility and equity to be able to grow the sport to even have something to offer to students like facilities and equipment.&nbsp;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">South Hills High School is a high school out of Covina, California. Their music program has a <a href="https://shhsband.com/competition-basics/">website</a> about their band program and how competition works. They say they compete like a tournament with judges on their looks and performance. </p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Madras High School Music has a <a href="https://www.facebook.com/madrasmusicdept/">Facebook</a> page for the entire department including band, choir and theater but nothing has been posted since July 2022. The school&#8217;s website features a tab for athletics but nothing for activities or clubs besides a small post at the very bottom of the page for recognition for FFA and an announcement for a band concert. </p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">If more students knew about how they worked and what happens at the events, these groups might get the attention they deserve from their schools and have the support they need to go even further.&nbsp;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">It’s not necessarily the fault of the school or administration for not recognizing other activities as much as they should. There are many different events going on all at once, it’s easy to understand how they can easily forget one group or another. The division of attention can still be resolved and improved.</p>
<p>The post <a href="https://obsidian.oregonyouthvoices.com/2023/03/15/spotlight-fight/">Spotlight Fight</a> appeared first on <a href="https://obsidian.oregonyouthvoices.com">Obsidian News | Oregon Youth Voices</a>.</p>
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		<post-id xmlns="com-wordpress:feed-additions:1">1001</post-id>	</item>
		<item>
		<title>Animal Shelter Crisis</title>
		<link>https://obsidian.oregonyouthvoices.com/2023/02/15/animal-shelter-crisis/</link>
		
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[CC Gonzalez]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 15 Feb 2023 22:40:43 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[News]]></category>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://www.oregonyouthvoices.com/obsidian/?p=940</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[<p>Around the United States, county animal shelters face overcrowding, disease, limited resources and underfunding.&#160; One of the biggest issues in animal shelters is overcrowding, some of which comes from people buying puppies or kittens, letting them grow up, then taking them to a shelter when they’re older and not as fun. Pictures and descriptions of dogs and cats posted for adoption on the Madras-based Three Rivers Humane Society website are an example of the problem: Most of the animals listed [&#8230;]</p>
<p>The post <a href="https://obsidian.oregonyouthvoices.com/2023/02/15/animal-shelter-crisis/">Animal Shelter Crisis</a> appeared first on <a href="https://obsidian.oregonyouthvoices.com">Obsidian News | Oregon Youth Voices</a>.</p>
]]></description>
										<content:encoded><![CDATA[
<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Around the United States, county animal shelters face overcrowding, disease, limited resources and underfunding.&nbsp;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">One of the biggest issues in animal shelters is overcrowding, some of which comes from people buying puppies or kittens, letting them grow up, then taking them to a shelter when they’re older and not as fun. Pictures and descriptions of dogs and cats posted for adoption on the Madras-based Three Rivers Humane Society website are an example of the problem: Most of the animals listed are older pets, who are “owner surrender,” meaning their previous owners gave them up. Strays are another major reason for overcrowding.&nbsp;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">“We’re really full but that’s not just us around here, that’s actually a nationwide problem right now,” said Three Rivers Humane Society executive director Stephen Drynan, who runs the shelter with Jerilee Drynan, Kim Hawkins and Monica Rendon. The biggest problem they face is “getting adoptions out, being able to pay bills and pay staff.”&nbsp;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Shelters often ask for donations of money or supplies for the animals from their communities. Three Rivers Humane Society places trailers around Madras to collect cans to make extra money but it’s not nearly enough for what they need to properly care for their animals.&nbsp;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Drynan said donors have been dropping out because they can’t afford to keep up anymore. But the biggest way people can help a local shelter is by volunteering or donating products, especially food.</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Nationally, 25% of animals taken into shelters in 2022 were owner surrender and 49% were strays, according to <a href="https://www.shelteranimalscount.org/industry-trends-dashboard/">Shelter Animals Count, a national database</a>. In Oregon, the data shows 35% of pets were dropped off by owners and 35% were strays. Taylor Covington of <a href="https://www.thezebra.com/resources/research/pet-adoption-statistics/#:~:text=Q%3A%20How%20many%20pets%20are,%25)%20than%20any%20other%20reason.">The Zebra</a>, an insurance company, said “14.1% of dogs are surrendered due to housing issues, the top reason for canines, while more cats are surrendered due to the owner having too many animals (22.6%) than any other reason.”&nbsp;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">In <a href="https://www.oregonhumane.org/about-us/financials/">The Humane Society of Oregon</a> 2021 report for expenses, 34% of its $18.9 million budget is spent on animal care and adoptions statewide. These local shelters heavily rely on their communities to keep them running.&nbsp;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">The best way to help is to look into your local animal shelter and offer to volunteer or donate. Even the smallest donation, things like food and close-to-new dog beds are much appreciated. A couple hours a week of volunteering could really help the smaller shelters wherever you live to give the animals the slightest chance at a better life. Reach out to your local animal shelter to offer a hand in volunteering or adopt a pet!</p>
<p>The post <a href="https://obsidian.oregonyouthvoices.com/2023/02/15/animal-shelter-crisis/">Animal Shelter Crisis</a> appeared first on <a href="https://obsidian.oregonyouthvoices.com">Obsidian News | Oregon Youth Voices</a>.</p>
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		<post-id xmlns="com-wordpress:feed-additions:1">940</post-id>	</item>
		<item>
		<title>Dealing with Your Break-Up</title>
		<link>https://obsidian.oregonyouthvoices.com/2023/02/14/dealing-with-your-break-up/</link>
		
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[CC Gonzalez]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Tue, 14 Feb 2023 04:54:03 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Opinion]]></category>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://www.oregonyouthvoices.com/obsidian/?p=933</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[<p>Don&#8217;t lie to yourself, breakups suck.&#160; No matter who was at fault or if you’re better off or not, they can be rough. The key to breakups is how you handle it, and how you move on.&#160; Teens go through at least one breakup while in high school, and the majority of them would tell you it&#8217;s hard. Some people will sit on their beds for weeks and pout, and some will move on the next day and claim they [&#8230;]</p>
<p>The post <a href="https://obsidian.oregonyouthvoices.com/2023/02/14/dealing-with-your-break-up/">Dealing with Your Break-Up</a> appeared first on <a href="https://obsidian.oregonyouthvoices.com">Obsidian News | Oregon Youth Voices</a>.</p>
]]></description>
										<content:encoded><![CDATA[
<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Don&#8217;t lie to yourself, breakups suck.&nbsp;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">No matter who was at fault or if you’re better off or not, they can be rough. The key to breakups is how you handle it, and how you move on.&nbsp;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Teens go through at least one breakup while in high school, and the majority of them would tell you it&#8217;s hard. Some people will sit on their beds for weeks and pout, and some will move on the next day and claim they are healed. Is there really a right way to get through the pain? Should you stay home and be sad, or distract yourself until you forget it? You could always stay in denial and wait for them to come back.</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">There isn&#8217;t a single right way to deal with it, but there are definitely ways you can ease the emotion. There are healthy and unhealthy coping mechanisms; everyone handles tough situations differently.&nbsp;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Some would argue that it’s very healthy to sit with your feelings and let yourself be vulnerable. This step often helps a person heal because they know what they are feeling, so they know what they need to do to make themselves feel better and how to target it directly.</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Others think the best solution is to completely ignore it and start the process of moving on as soon as they can. Whether that means finding someone new or trying to find things to constantly stay distracted is up to the individual. That could mean going out and talking to new people within the first couple of days to not have to deal with their feelings. This solution might work for you, but are you really moving on or burying your emotions?</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">In an <a href="https://www.unh.edu/pacs/break-ups-how-help-yourself-move">article</a> from the University of New Hampshire, experts said to “feel the feelings”, and claim you&#8217;ll probably feel a lot of contradictory feelings; denying or repressing them will simply make the grieving process more difficult and drawn out. So, give yourself permission to feel your emotions while keeping in mind that it’s only temporary. It&#8217;s better to accept your feelings as they come rather than ignore them.</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Laura Robinson, licensed professional counselor in Bend and Redmond, believes every way to heal depends on what happened within the relationship and after. Robinson doesn&#8217;t think there is a right or wrong way; however, there are some coping mechanisms that are healthier than others.</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">“Validate the pain and sadness that you&#8217;re feeling and reach out to family and friends and remember the pain will pass,” Robinson said. “Distraction has its place… but sit with your feelings to validate your pain. On the other hand, part of mindfulness is not over-identifying feelings and knowing it will pass.” It&#8217;s always a good idea to ask for help for any issue.</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">Working on yourself to be a better person, even if you weren&#8217;t the problem in the relationship, is the biggest thing you can do for yourself. Prioritizing self-care after a break-up could mean going no-contact with the other person, treating yourself with nice things (while managing money wisely), changing your lifestyle or even taking a walk every day to clear your head. Knowing you can stay healthy physically and emotionally could accelerate the process of healing and moving on.&nbsp;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">The grief of a breakup will eventually pass, and the only certain way to heal is with time. It&#8217;s okay to miss a person, such as the way they used to treat you or your relationship, but don&#8217;t dwell on the past.&nbsp;</p>



<p class="wp-block-paragraph">No one knows how to have a perfect relationship, so when it ends, the important thing to remember is that you can only change how you behave and how you contribute to the issue or the solution. If it ends, there&#8217;s no point in trying to rationalize everything about what happened. If you know you did everything right, you&#8217;ll drive yourself crazy trying to find answers to hypotheticals or trying to get the other person to change. If they wanted to, they would.&nbsp;</p>
<p>The post <a href="https://obsidian.oregonyouthvoices.com/2023/02/14/dealing-with-your-break-up/">Dealing with Your Break-Up</a> appeared first on <a href="https://obsidian.oregonyouthvoices.com">Obsidian News | Oregon Youth Voices</a>.</p>
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